Samantha Casey

Sail-Mender

Bloody Charon needed a sailor, adept with sails

While he attended the helm. My time had

Not yet passed, but he allowed me to board

The boat, fluffs its sails and ensure its

Passage safe across. The first decade

Was sweet, seeing men and widows unload

Onto the safe shore. Long they waited 

And finally they arrived. But as the glee 

Stayed constant, my despair did rise. Sewing

A tear in the sails, I could not help but 

Look upon the souls with envy. The Lords

And peasants alike knew what I would not

For another ninety years. The distrust 

When the first boarded the ship waning 

As the shore grew near enflamed my jealousy

Until my anger raged bright as the sun 

On these sunless plains. As years past

And countless journeys cross were had,

My rage settled into a dull pain that attacked

My conscience long and constant. Not often,

But sometimes a soul falls off in more tumultuous

Trips. A child, not more than ten and two,

Robbed of youth and adulthood too, waivered

As we hit a wave, and being so close to 

The river Styx, swiftly fell and washed 

Away, before the mother had time to pray.

I saw her fall and sweep by me, my arm 

Froze still as she passed. Why should she

Be allowed to leave, when I was stuck here 

For as long as I could see. I went back to 

My sails as the mother wailed and saw no point

In consolation. Now, after years of service,

Across the banks and off the ship, I see 

Her every night, praying to a self in past

To reach out a hand and save her from

The neverending misery.

Famished

I felt famished after killing the baby inside

Me. I hungered for Chinese food, it seemed

Fitting considering it was cheap and quick

And deliciously addictive. I'm trying intermittent

Fasting, which makes my stomach hurt

Like crazy right around four every afternoon,

So it's no surprise when the churning 

Hits me this afternoon, but I imagine it's

The little fetus waging war against the plan B

That I've made my plan A. Part of me is

Rooting for the little guy, a true underdog

Story, but then I remember how horrible 

I'd be as a mother due to the irresponsibility

Shown by popping plan B like candy.  Maybe

When I'm older and my uterus is too crusty 

To give birth I'll finally have my life together

Enough to care for another. But today 

Is not that day.

My First Love

My first love was the sea, her violence and her caring caress.

I loved her with a passion that knows the pain she can inflict.

My second love was the night sky, her beauty and her listening patience.

I loved her with the ease that comfortability brings.

My last love was the forest, her strength and her stalwart independence.

I loved her with the vulnerability that comes with admiration.

When they died, one by one, poisoned, smothered and burned, 

I grieved for years, walking out to where we first met,

But slowly, I moved on, wading through this new life

Where love is lost, beauty is gone, strength destroyed

And we wallow in the consequences of our actions